Editor's note: Readers, if you have ever watched Two and a Half Men of your own volition, you probably shouldn't read this post, because I'm going to trash talk you. Sorry.
As everyone knows, the sitcom is in sorry, sorry shape. I mean, According to Jim is still on. Horrible Brad Garrett vehicle Til Death somehow got picked up for a second season (it's not that I've ever watched an episode, but when you figure they put the best parts in the commercials . . . no thanks). But, most tellingly, the number one sitcom on the air is Two and a Half Men. Have you tried to watch that show? I've made like three attempts, and have discovered to be, in a word, unwatchable. It's NOT FUNNY. It's not ever trying that hard to be funny. I can't even fathom living people finding it entertaining . . . although the laugh track thinks it's a riot. Here is an actual transcript (no exaggeration) of the four seconds I managed to watch of it (keep in mind, all of the actors are barely bothering to inflect their lines, let alone give some kind of funny delivery):
Charlie Sheen: Junior high, huh? That brings back some memories.
[laugh track]
Other guy: Can we please not go down that road?
[laugh track]
Fat kid: What do you mean?
[laugh track]
Other guy: It's just that kids in junior high can be kind of judgmental.
[laugh track]
Sassy fat housemaid: Especially if you're knocked up.
[HUGE laugh track]
That's right; one (unfunny) joke, five laughs. America, for watching this, you're stupid.
"especially if you're knocked up," that's hilarious! Me and the girlfriend have got to watch more of that show!
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