Not a Medical Breakthrough!

Google News, in the Health section, informed me that:

Too much sugar-free gum linked to bowel problems

But I already knew that. Once this clinic patient complained about getting diarrhea after quitting smoking, and House told him that it was because of all the gum he had been chewing to replace cigarettes.

Way to be slower on the uptake than a fictional Vicodin-addicted doctor, German scientists. Click here to read more . . .

Television Round-Up

Last year, the shows I made time for were 1. (far and away top television priority) House, 2. Grey's Anatomy, and 3. (becoming increasingly important as the season wore on) Ugly Betty. Things have shifted somewhat, so (in particular order) here are my opinions on some shows.

House

I dunno . . . I watched the first two episodes, and it was . . . fine. I didn't watch last week's (which my roommate told me was really good) because I just was entranced enough by the first two to arrange my evening around it.

Clearly, this is a different situation from past seasons.

I'm not quite sure what my deal is. Maybe it's that the ducklings (you know, Chase, Cameron, and Foreman) weren't in them enough. Maybe it's because I feel like they're going the wrong direction, adding new apprentice doctors instead of exploring the interesting and underdeveloped characters they already have.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not breaking up with House. I'm just not as invested as I'm used to being. So we'll see.

America's Next Top Model

I'm not going to tell you that America's Next Top Model is a good show. It isn't.

It has the standard reality show staples: unrealistically catty people shoved into a house together, "challenges," eliminations, and incredible host vanity. And I must say, in that last category, ANTM excels. The force of Tyra Banks' ego could power a medium-sized city.

But what really sets ANTM apart is the ridiculousness. Let's start with the fact that it's about modeling. Modeling and reality are not, as you may be aware, close associates. But ANTM is even operating in the universe of the modeling industry. The winners of the show don't actually get to become top models . . . they're too old, they look weird, and if they had the ability to become models, they wouldn't have to go on the show.

My favorite part is the stupid photo shoots that they do. Tonight's theme? "Super-duper high fashion gargoyles." I invite you to read that phrase one more time.

Plus, they get coached by ludicrous people, like that time they got taught how to twirl by professional twirlers--not baton-twirling, mind you. Twirling around. Like, spinning. Professional twirlers. And tonight, they were told how to pose while jumping on trampolines by, as his caption told us, "Benny Ninja: posing instructor."

My gentleman caller is earning all kinds of points watching this show.

Ugly Betty

SO GOOD!

Hilarious, engaging, interesting . . . I don't know what else to say.

I mean, it's just so good.

Carpoolers

I don't care, I'm just going to say it. This show is funny. It's stupid, but on purpose, which is always key. The characters are caricatures, but well-drawn ones. My favorite one is Dull White Guy's son, who is basically an extroverted Napoleon Dynamite. He makes me laugh.

On a final tv-related note, Dean Cain apparently is guest starring on Smallville this week. How did that take so long?

Click here to read more . . .

A Questionable Purchase

So . . . I just spent 10 American dollars on The Very Best of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons. You know. The high-pitched guys.

Here's what happened: I used to think that the Four Seasons were good for making fun of. Exclusively. But then, once I got my satellite radio, I realized there were several songs of theirs that I got a kick out of listening to, so I tagged them as a favorite so I'd get alerted whenever they were on. And you know what? Every time they're on, I listen, and I enjoy it. Is that so wrong?

So now I have the whole thing on iTunes.

And I'm pretty happy about it.

P.S. Another thing I'm happy about? There's a new Terry Pratchett book coming out on September 18th! I'm so glad I went to Amazon to research this blog entry!

P.P.S. Speaking of things Amazon knows I like (it's a little creepy how good at that it is), how have I not bought Season 3 of House yet?

Click here to read more . . .

The Most Played Songs on My iTunes

For no particular reason, I bring you my top ten most played songs on iTunes. This is of course skewed toward songs I've downloaded since I've gotten this computer, because when I first get a song, I listen to it over and over and over. It's also skewed toward the 1776 soundtrack. (What can I say? I just never get tired of that show. So good.)

10. "Ain't No Other Man" by Christina Aguilera (62 times). What? It's good! Shut up!

9. "Yours Yours Yours" from the 1776 soundtrack (65). So sad. John and Abigail can't be together because of the fight for freedom and duty and responsibility and stuff. But they're so in love!

8. "Only Want to Be with You" by Dusty Springfield (67). NOT to be confused with the similarly titled song by Hootie and the Blowfish. No sir.

7. "But, Mr. Adams" from the 1776 soundtrack (69). It's my favorite part of the show, because it's hilarious when the rest of the Declaration Committee marvels that John Adams, too, misses--ahem--his wife.

6. "Love Child" by the Supremes (70). Fantastic.

5. "Is Anybody There?" sung by William Daniels, from the 1776 soundtrack (74). This one is great for when you feel like the world is against you, but are you going to give up? No! Just like John Adams.

4. "I Guess That's Why They Call it the Blues" by Elton John (92). My favorite part is how the song title gets sung more emphatically each time it comes up.

3. "If You Really Love Me" by Stevie Wonder (108). Man, I love Stevie Wonder.

2. "We Can Work it Out" by Stevie Wonder (122). Yes, it's a Stevie Wonder cover of the Beatles song. It's not only good and fun in that lovely Stevie Wonder way, but it's also interesting to marvel at how different it is from the original.

1. "Colors" by Amos Lee (123). Has anybody else heard of this song? I only discovered it because it plays over the end of an episode of House. It's simple and sweet and sad and I apparently like it a whole lot. Click here to read more . . .

Ridiculous Boyfriend Spotlight On . . .

Dr. Chase!

Just because House is the best show on television doesn’t mean it doesn’t have its flaws. Yes, it can be a little formulaic, and yes, every season there’s an annoying story arc with somebody eeeeevil out to get House (or some chick who used to live with him out to mess with his mind), and no, you should not try to watch an episode while eating. But if I could fix one thing about House, I would give Dr. Chase more lines.

This is not simply because Dr. Chase is very, very pretty and has a delightful Australian accent. The actor who plays him is very good—he’s probably the second-best actor on the show, which is a very big compliment for somebody who’s on a show with Hugh Laurie.

Also (and this is a problem for all non-House characters on the show besides annoying Cameron), we know very little about Chase’s character. What we do know, however, speaks well to his qualification as a Ridiculous Boyfriend.

1. He’s a sweetie. Like when he decided that he wanted to have a real relationship with Cameron and then she shot him down? His sad face was so sad!

2. Unusually for a tv character, he’s religious. And I don’t care what your God-views are, when he said that prayer over that baby when he was doing an autopsy on it . . . only a heart of stone would have failed to melt.

3. He's good with kids. Every time there's a nipper on the show, Chase bonds with it. (And only kissed one of them.)

4. I already mentioned he's Australian, right?

5. And pretty?

Click here to read more . . .

Don't You Judge Me!

Tonight

I am

going to watch

American Idol . . .

on purpose.

Yes, it's true. But I have three good . . . three not-awful reasons for doing so. Which I will present in reverse order to kick up the suspense.

3. Apparently, most of the people still on there can actually sing. I've tried and physically cannot watch the early episodes of each season where it's 1.5 minutes of good singing and 46.5 minutes of stupid people embarrassing themselves. I know they have to know how bad they are, and I know they're purposely subjecting themselves to it just to get on tv, but I still feel really sorry for them. And that's not good entertainment.

2.5 (because it's not really a reason, as much as laziness) It's on right before House, which I'll be watching anyway, so all I have to do is turn on the tv an hour earlier.

(Maybe I just put that in there to remind you that House is on tonight.)

2. I've been reading the Television Without Pity recaps of the last few weeks of American Idol, and they are FUNNY. So they should be even funnier if I actually watch the show beforehand!

But the number 1 reason I'm watching American Idol (on purpose!) tonight?

S a n j a y a !

I can't help it! I need to witness the phenomenon!

Click here to read more . . .