Clearly, the Ladies Should Not Touch Frankie Valli with a Ten-to-Thirty Foot Pole

I do enjoy me some Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons. Admittedly, it's in large part because I find them hilarious. I mean, they couple that classic Fifties earnestness with the ludicrous high-pitched harmonies--it's great. However, the subject matter of the songs belies the sweetly innocent sound of them. Taking for instance the lyrics of the songs on their greatest hits CD, one finds that the stories they tell are pretty dark. (And please forgive me for the punctuation that doesn't really make sense.)

Several songs are in the "I'm really sorry we can't be together" genre:
. . . because I'm too poor ("Dawn [Go Away]")
. . . because you're too poor ("Rag Doll")
. . . because you love somebody else more than you love me, so stop staying with me out of pity ("Opus 17 [Don't You Worry 'Bout Me]")
. . . because I'm married ("Bye Bye Baby [Baby Goodbye]")

They visit the always-fruitful song-mine of "My dad told me to stop being such a pansy and letting you treat me like dirt": ("Walk Like a Man")

And, conversely, "I hope you'll take me back after you dumped me for treating you like dirt": ("Working My Way Back to You") and the similar "I hope you'll take me back after you dumped me for cheating on you (but it was meaningless, I swear!): ("C'mon Marianne"), and of course, "I'll generously forgive you for dumping me (after thinking--mistakenly!--that I had cheated on you): ("Ronnie")

There's the extremely popular "It was pretty awesome that one time I had sex with that chick I didn’t know": ("December 1963 [Oh What a Night!]")

Then there's "I dumped you just to prove a point, but then, unfortunately for me, you took it really well": ("Big Girls Don't Cry")

Sure, there are a few songs about being in love and all happy, but on balance, these songs are either very pitiful or very jerkwaddy. It's somewhat mystifying how they can be so catchy!