Deep Thoughts I've Had Today

• What if Guns, Germs, and Steel had been written not by Jared Diamond, but by Dustin Diamond?
• It must be hard for O. J. Simpson to get dates.
• "I'm a Little Teapot" and the Jeopardy! "think music" are eerily similar. Here: sing "Tip me over and pour me out," except slow down on "pour me out" and then add a "bum bum" of typanies at the end. . . . See?